ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
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I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
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You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
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