love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Randomize
