Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
