Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
