I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
