just tell him i said nine months
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
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