these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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