Can Purell be used as lube?
I want you more than these girls want KFC
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
