I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
he told me I talked like a deaf person
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
