Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Randomize