i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
