You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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