What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.