Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
i just sent this text using only my big toe
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap