would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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