Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
