ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
