Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
