maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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