WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
