the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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