Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I went to an adult Halloween party last night dressed as Mrs. Doubtfire, but I woke up on a stranger's couch surrounded by sleeping children in karate gi's. And I accidentally flushed my granny wig mid-puke, so if they wake up I'm gonna have to convince them that I'm just a weird older man and not a terrible cross dresser.
How did you come to this point in your life?
Good bartenders.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize
