garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
