I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
