OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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