I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize