where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
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