He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
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Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
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Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
do nipples grow back?
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