So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
