Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
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