I need help removing her.
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
her facebook's as public as her vagina
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
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