I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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