Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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