I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize