More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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