he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Randomize