You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
