dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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