I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
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