hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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