a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
