my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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