Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
