I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Randomize
