He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
