she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
