Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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