you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
