I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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