I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Come share oat with me in your robe
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
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