omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
