I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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